Unwanted Face

I wrote this poem a couple months back although it’s incomplete I wanted to share it.

Faces
There’s a faceless face in the mirror staring at me.
I thought of it as pretty
Perfectly clear, not a part of it blemished.
No wrinkles. No scars. Not even a pimple.
A faultless master piece that god created.

I wear this face one day so they all could see,
I wanted to gloat in it’s beauty so that finally someone could see me.
The real me!

It first started with the whispers,
Then like a dark shadow it began clinging behind me everywhere I go.
Every word, every taunt, every mockery!
The dissdain looks and scorn causes me misery.

There’s a face this time in the mirror staring at me,
They say it’s pretty.
Perfeclty countoured, not a part of it hideous.
No wrinkles. No scars. Not even a pimple.
A faultless materpiece that humans created.

I wear this face one day so they all can see.
I wanted to cry with the praises I recieved with this fake beauty.
Such a pity!

~Farzanna Pasha 

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Me vs. Life

Many times I would sit and wonder if life truly hates me. I have this theory that life has some sort of supernatural power to sink me so deep into the ground where there is no light for me to find my way out and no air to keep from dying of suffocation.
Now don’t get me wrong; I don’t hate life and I don’t have it in my mind to commit suicide. I love living! I love being able to wake in the morning to another new day of adventure and being able to do all you can do because life is what you make of it. You have to be willing to put 100% effort into making it however you imagine your life to be and damn all those pulling you down.
Though sometimes you have to grab onto life with both hands and wrestle with it; strangle it with all the strength you can muster and risk going down a sore loser because some endings can result with something so beautiful that you can be blinded by it. That the mere thought of it would make you shed tears of joy or gaze at it in wonder of such adoration.
Recently however, my life is playing a game of whack-a-mole, with me being the mole. Every time I find myself coming up from that atramentous ground for a breath, I would get whacked back into it with that damn mallet and each time it would take longer for me to find my way back up again. Therefore, expanding time of being suffocated.  
But every time I get whacked, it would make me stronger. It builds my resistance and harden me to the harshness of life and it would make me want to prove that I can surpass and overcome this. No matter how many scars I may obtain or how bent out of shape I may be, I will arise standing tall and a better person than I started out to be.
So life, bring it on! I’m here with my boxing gloves on waiting for you to take the first swing, waiting to show you that no matter how hard you whack at me I will come out that hole every time like a freshly water seed breaking through its coat to turn into a beautiful daylily.

Donald Trump vs. Fifty shades of Grey

When I started this blog webpage I promised myself that never was I ever going to publish anything political; but for obvious reasons I became very annoyed over this term’s presidential election. Some would say I am biased because I am an immigrant and a woman who values self worth but this is all besides the point of this blog.

As a book reviewer/blogger, I find it very ignorant of the American population who compared Donald Trump’s remark where he said “Grab em’ by the pu**y” to that of the E. L. James Book Fifty shades of Grey. Firstly I just want it to be made aware that Mr. Trump made this remark in 2005 whereas Fifty shades of Grey was published in 2011, if I am correct.

For those who support Mr. Trump but saying that this is just “locker room talk,” well then let me enlightened you then(see what I just did there)  

1. No characters in Fifty shades of Grey are running for president!!!! So whatever they say within the book should not be a judge of character.

2. Everything that happens in Fifty shades of Grey is consensual. Mr Grey did not walk up to Anastasia and “Grab em’by the pu**y!!

3. Nothing that happened in the book raised alarm for sexual harassment. Every act that happened between the characters was talked about and there as even a contract which explained everything that Christain wanted sexually. There was even negotiations and compromise of said contract.

4. BDSM is an actual lifestyle between consensual partners!!!

5. Fifty shades of Grey is fictional!! As much as we readers would love a world where Christian Grey actually exists, we can’t because he is just a character in a book.

6.  I have read then entire series of Fifty shades, even the one with Christian’s point of view of the first book and NEVER had I come across a part of the book where Christian talks down to Anastasia to make her feel as if she was just the dirt under his foot. And yes, this is how any woman with the right frame of mind would feel every time Mr. Trump opened his mouth to talk about women.

7. submissive [suhb-mis-iv] – adjective1. inclined or ready to submit; unresistingly or humbly obedient: submissive servants.2. marked by or indicating submission: a submissive reply.Origin: 1580–90; submiss + -iveSynonyms: 1. tractable, compliant, pliant, amenable. 2. passive, resigned, patient, docile, tame, subdued

I quoted this from Fifty shades of Grey, Christian’s email to Anastasia.

It outlined the definition of how Christian Grey expected Anastasia to behave towards him. But did she? NO! She didn’t. Christian, from the very start made it clear he was into the BDSM lifestyle and was only looking for a submissive. A Submissive!!! And those who compared Mr. Trump remark to the book clearly see all women as submissive.

8. If the people who are comparing Fifty shades of Grey to Mr. Trump’s remark read the continuing books in the series, they would understand that not only did Christain accept Anastasia and left the BDSM lifestyle but he also found love,happiness,family and acceptance of himself. He also thanked Anastasia because without her, he would’ve been a miserable, lonely man.

Now I could go on and on for days on this topic but I am just going to leave it like this. Any yes, over 80 million copies were sold of Fifty Shades of Grey and frankly it is because women have to turn to fiction to find pleasure because it is men like Donald Trump with their arrogant and egotistical way that we find ourselves turned off by the idea of being with them

Eid Mubarak?

Many of you may not know this about me but I am/was Muslim. Trust me I don’t know what to tell people who asks me what is my religious status. Well my mom was a Catholic Christian before she married my dad, she then converted into Muslim to be one with him. But she would still occasionally read a bible.

Growing up I had an ideal Muslim background. My dad was what you can call a religious man growing up so he wanted the same for his children. When I was maybe around 10 I attended a full time Muslim school where I had to dress in the full Muslim attire for 8-9 hours a day.

I can tell you it was an experience and a half for the first couple of weeks upon starting this school. AT the time I really hated my father for making me go, but now looking back I am glad he did. I learnt so much from this well hated religion where everyone throw harmful words against.

In my honest opinion it is not Muslim people who are terrorist but people itself. I can guarantee you that in the one year plus an extra summer class that I attended the school not once was I taught violence. I was taught things that bring peace and love. It taught me not to back bite, to love and honor my parents and to be at peace with not only myself but with everyone.

Eventually I left the school because it was more of a religion teaching school than an academically teaching school.

Now fast forward a decade and my mother has decided to become a Hindu. My father would swear he’s still a Muslim but he would take part in the Hindu things my mother do. And for those who knows Hindu and Muslim religion would know that this is not possible. 

Firstly Hindu’s so not consume beef whereas Muslim uses the bull as a sacrifice, they would then share the meat and also consume the meat.

Also some Hindu’s religious work consists the use of alcohol and cigarettes whereas the Muslims believe alcohol and cigarettes are haram (sinful).

So you can imagine the predicament my parents put me in. But my solution to the problem is to be both. When Hindus have a religious event taking place for that period of time I am also Hindu. When the Muslims have a religious event taking place for that period of time I am Muslim.

Many may think it unorthodox but I do it for my parents. 

Happy Eid Mubarak to all my Muslims Brothers and Sisters!!!

 

Vent It 1!!

Ohh My God!! You don’t know how long I said I was going to make this blog but for some reason I always change my mind at the last moment. 

So the purpose of this blog will be to air out all of my worries and hopefully some of you may or may not be going through what I am. I am hoping it acts as a friend to anyone who feels as if there is no one out there listening to them. I want every one to know that no matter what someone is always willing to listen. And in this case that someone is me 🙂

I may or may not be posting on this website everyday or maybe one a week depending on what my time consumption is like. But know that once you email me, I will reply within that day.

 Aside from reading books and reviewing them, I am also currently writing my very first book. Yayy!!! I am supper excited to one day be called an author. It will be self published and maybe finished by this year end. Throughout this blog I will be mentioning the progress of it and you will be the first to know when it comes out.

So don’t be afraid to Vent it it me..